For someone who loves words so very much, they sure haven’t loved her so much back as of late. It’s almost as if we are allotted a certain number of words to use and express and curate – and once we hit that quota, we done. My word budget has been used entirely in erryday life – during inspiring conversations with friends and family; during my other job as a speechie; within projects and collaborations with other peeps, companies and businesses. So, every time I sit in my writing chair and set the intention to write and share within this forum, I am as dry as a prawn cracker. Nothing comes up. No juice, no fruit, no creation, no nuttin’. But today I refuse to vacate this space until I have flexed my writing muscle and tried to capture and give form to the thoughts, lessons and musings that have been swirling in the noggins of myself and my nearest and dearest.
Generally the words that pour out are those that explore the themes and trends of lives around me. Thoughts and fears of girlfriends, stuck on repeat and synonymous with erry chicka in my life. As of late, and in light of the recent celebration of International Women’s Day, many of these have been around the concept of what it means to be ‘woman’, what we are tired of continuing//perpetuating and what we are inspired to advocate for.
It is seeming to be both a terrifying and an incredibly inspiring time to own a ‘gina. There is such an empowering movement within the sisterhood, with women recognizing the light in one another and seeking to be mirrors of each other’s greatness rather than buying into the whole notion of ‘competition’. A few men are even coming to the table, honouring the sacred feminine and acknowledging just how badass women are. But it ain’t so flash being a lady when your insta feed is teeming with falsely altered images of perfect women; seemingly effortless conceptions, births, children; conflicting encouragement to ‘be yourself’ only to be followed up quickly with a ‘oh, but not like that’ when we get it wrong.
Slowly but surely the paradigm is shifting and more and more of us are refusing to accept the bulltwang we have been fed for countless years about being in opposition. From a hippie perspective, none of us are in competition and we are all in this big, bad, beautiful world together. But especially when it comes to the sisterhood – we are recognizing that we can achieve magical, awe inspiring and powerful things when we work in collaboration and support of one another’s endeavours. When we find ourselves upset over someone having x, y or z (the promotion, the man, the dream home) it implies that we believe there isn’t enough of x, y or z for everyone. That, someone, by one person having what we desire, means that the desired resources are finite and therefore not available to us too. But that just ain’t true. If we hustle and do the work and show up as best we can, we receive what’s intended for us. It might not look how we expect it to, and it might seem like we ‘miss out’ because your coworker scored the gig we were vying for, just remind yourself that what’s intended for you will always find a way. But … back to the ladies.
We are being called and pulled to band together, now more than ever before. Think about how nurturing it is to have a soulful, quiet night in with the girls – it is so sacred and special and energizing. That’s not to say by any means that you can’t experience that same sense of buzz and vibrancy with a bunch of dudes, but there’s no denying that the energy is a little different. With girls, it’s fluid and light and compassionate and gentle and soft. We feel understood, we don’t feel judged or inhibited, we allow ourselves to be totally and utterly present and real. These are the environments that you need to make space for in your lives. These moments of connection and support are incredibly affirming and allow us to then go back into our lives and tackle obstacles with an enhanced sense of reinforcement, confidence and alignment. The girls have our back, we know what needs to be done. As women, we think and operate differently to men. And I, for one, LOVE us and them for that. I adore learning how men think and approach things and process their world and I strive to take on a little of that in my own life. But there is an undeniable sense of camaraderie that comes with women discussing what it is to be a woman in (at times) a man’s world. I’ve had a number of conversations and experiences of women feeling frustrated by the inequalities and double standards either within our world or, often, within the workplace. We engage in our world differently, we see the world different and for so long that’s been viewed as a negative.
It ain’t hard to see that the masculine way (order, definitive, black and white, tit for tat) of doing things has served us thus far but it ain’t doing us or the planet any favours. A new way of thinking is becoming not even so much ‘preferred’ but kind of necessary. The world and its problems aren’t black and white, rigid, one solution kind of things – these require leaders with heart, passion, compassion, whose thinking is fluid and all shades of grey and flexible. This isn’t man vs woman, this is more of a need to amp up our feminine, which you’ve heard me and countless others harp on a lot about of late. We possess both energies and even us ladies, especially in the corporate world, can get really caught up in our masculine and may need to recalibrate and redirect these energies to be more feminine. How do we do this? Sisterhood. Tune into your lady friends. Pencil in that phone or coffee date and talk about what’s happening in your world, how you are (or how you’re not) showing up for it, your obstacles, your wins, your strengths, your fears – and watch the magic of connection and collaboration unfold. You will literally walk away feeling lighter and strengthened, because now you’ve got someone else’s energy carrying your load. And you, theirs. Celebrate your friends (male and female) on their successes and wins, compliment them on their qualities, be a mirror for their brilliance when their own self belief is a little lacking.
We are all in this together.
Blessings and an unshakable love for the ladies x