No one likes to be in situations that are uncomfortable or that make you feel overwhelmed, sad or angry (or a shitty little cocktail of the three). I get that. But, from my experience, it’s within these situations that you learn the most about yourself and your world. Comfort is brilliant and it yields a profound sense of contentment and stability – like a nice little garden bed, the flowers will grow slow and steady. Douse that garden bed with (all organic, natural, bio) fertiliser to shake things up a bit and BLAMO. Little fernie might not like it initially, it’s a different environment, they have to figure out how to acclimatise, it might hurt a little to grow so fast … but they flourish. We are no different. Give us a mundane life of routine and comfort, yeah it feels ok and we exist in our safe little confines and it appeases a sense of calm – but it doesn’t evoke the aliveness and rawness that comes from more ‘outside the norm’ experiences.

It ain’t no secret that travel can support your growth and self discovery. Eat Pray Love made that abundantly clear. And it’s usually the amalgamation of both positive and negative encounters that are woven into the totality of the traveling experience that ignite this growth. You really learn a shiz load about yourself when your luggage goes missing from a small airport, less than twelve hours before you’re due to leave the country on a 30hr commute back home with nothing more than the (kind of skimpy) clothes on your back. For a hypothetical example, of course. BUT I have actually found that my biggest lessons and teachings have been born from situations//circumstance since I have returned home. And I have never been so grateful for these shitty, no good, bad, ugly, stupid circumstances. I actually LOVE them. Like a bad boy that we know is no good for us, covered in tats and adorned with a ‘fuckboy’ haircut, we find ourselves willingly going back for more and more and we come out of the effed up situation with a greater realisation of who we are, what we deserve and what we are in no way willing to settle for.

1 // They force you to get uncomfortable.

Because, yep, discomfort is the breeding ground for connection to your truest self and your intuition. When you’re uncomfortable, physically or emotionally, you become hyperaware of your sensations. Holding a plank pose at the gym, you feel every single cell and muscle fiber. Being confronted with the passing of a loved one, you become acutely aware of every inch of yourself and the deep roots of grief that run the length of your veins.

2 // They often bring to the surface that which we hold most dear and important.

Our priorities and values are too often influenced by the people around us and we shave off // compromise these aspects of ourselves to fit or make others happy. And we wind up losing that knowing of what WE ourselves value and hold dear. When we are confronted with situations that demand us to express our truth – we have no choice but to challenge ourselves to recognise what exactly our truth is. What are our non negotiables? Our virtues that we deem unshakable and inflexible. Stand up for these and defend them with all you have.

3 // They reveal the true colours of others, too.

I am very much someone who can see the good in others, sometimes to a fault. And I believe that we are all good at our core, and we all want and are deserving of epic love and kindness. BUT it’s in these challenging situations that people often reveal their true selves and sometimes these aren’t always in alignment with the people and behaviours that we deserve. Situations that bring out the worst in others are never pleasant but they do give good insight into ones’ character and how they handle the curveballs of life.

4 // It’s always darkest before the dawn.

Shitty situations are often to prelude to an epic win. They are kind of like the foreplay of life, it can be a little uncomfortable as you fumble around but ultimately you know it’s leading you to bigger and better things, BLAMO. When you’re in the midst of a shitstorm, try to flip your perspective and excitedly look forwards with total conviction that life is about to shine. Reflect on times gone by that have perhaps been painful or uncomfortable and try to recall the sequence of events that followed – it all gets a little brighter and easier. And, more often than not, it brings us to an incredible place that we otherwise may not have arrived at if we hadn’t slogged it up shit creek, sans paddle, beforehand.

Blessings and loads of shitty foreplay x

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